I wasn't afraid of causing pain — it helped the wounded: combat medic Lidiia Zabolotska's story

The following story is about combat medic Lidiia Zabolotska, who has been saving soldiers on various fronts throughout the ten-year Russian-Ukrainian war. She first joined the 1st Assault Company under Hero of Ukraine Dmytro Kotsiubailo, who later became the godfather of her first daughter. Twice, Lidiia returned to civilian life, yet each time, duty called her back. She shared her experiences, the challenges soldiers face, and her hopes for the future.

"How did I become a combat medic? They asked me, 'Do you know anything about medicine?' I said, 'Yes.' And they responded, 'That's it, you're a combat medic.'" This is how Lidiia Zabolotska recalls the start of her journey in the separate assault company of Hero of Ukraine Dmytro Kotsiubailo (Da Vinci). She joined the military in December 2014 after her friend went missing in the Ilovaisk encirclement.

"This led me to start helping his family search for him. Over time, I decided to join the defense of my homeland," Lidiia recalls.*"No one took my decision to go to war seriously. I was looking for a volunteer battalion, and after an interview, I felt drawn to the OUN Battalion, the Organization of Ukrainian Nationalists. Just two weeks later, I was already at the training base. My mom asked me to sign a contract because it provided more certainty, but she had no idea when or where I was leaving until the very last moment. I packed my things in just two hours, found a car, and was on my way to the training base almost immediately. When my mom came home from work, I was already sitting there with my bags, ready to say goodbye. She was completely shocked — she couldn’t believe it was really happening. But later, she became one of my biggest supporters."

Photo: first visit to the Organization of Ukrainian Nationalists base

At that time, Lidiia was the only woman in her unit. The first uniform they found for her was a coat in size 52 or 54, which she had to tie with a belt. Her pants were several sizes too big, so she wore her own hat and the same shoes she had arrived in instead of proper boots.

"We trained with a single rifle, assembling and disassembling it over and over. For drills, we ran with wooden rifles made by the headmaster of the local school. Those who weren’t lucky enough to get one had to run with sticks instead," Lidiia recalls the early days of the war.

For two years, she did not participate in direct combat but focused on public activities. Her more active involvement began when she transferred to the 1st Separate Assault Company under Hero of Ukraine Dmytro Kotsiubailo (Da Vinci).

Photo: holding an assault rifle for the first time

"When I first went to the front line, Da Vinci was really worried about me. My job was to check the soldiers' first aid kits to ensure they had everything needed for maximum safety. Before that, one of our legendary snipers—who, unfortunately, was killed last year—had been highly effective against the Russians, and we were being shelled from all directions.

I remember sitting with the late People's Hero of Ukraine, Hans, drinking coffee in a small makeshift kitchen. He looked at me and said, 'You realize that if a shell lands here, we're gone?' I nodded, 'Yes.' He asked, 'Aren’t you scared?' I just smiled and replied, 'No, because then no one would be left to give Da Vinci a hard time.'" Lidiia laughs.

Photo: The taller man is a volunteer from Belarus, Hans, who was awarded the title of People's Hero of Ukraine

Lidiia studied combat medicine for three months, receiving assistance from Yana Zinkevych and also taking online courses.

"We had a situation after which Da Vinci looked at me, asked about the incident, and then said, 'So, are you ready to go to the front line tomorrow?' I replied, 'Yes.' For me, this was the highest level of trust because he trusted me to go to the front line with him. I wasn’t afraid of blood, I wasn’t afraid to see severe wounds, and I wasn’t afraid to cause pain. I knew it was for the benefit of the wounded."

Lidiia says that most of the soldiers she encountered had arm injuries, with only one having problems with his leg.

"These are moments I don’t really want to recall because, unfortunately, more than half of these guys are no longer with us. But there were funny moments too, like when I’d arrive at the hospital, and they’d give me this guilty look, as if to say, 'We didn’t want to get injured, you taught us what to do,'" Lidiia laughs.

"I had one case with Pavuk (that’s the call sign of my fellow soldier). A sniper's bullet of caliber 12.7 hit his arm. I still can’t believe how his arm didn’t get torn off. We provided first aid, brought him to the hospital, and prepared the stretcher, but he said, 'Am I a cripple? I’m not going to ride on that. Let those who can’t walk use it. I’ll walk on foot.' He’d lost a lot of blood. We were very worried he might lose his arm — it was a very serious injury. But he endured every procedure. I was standing there watching as blood soaked through everything, forming a real pool of blood on the ground. I said, 'No, sit on the stretcher, let them take you to the surgical department.'"

Photo: Avdiivka Forest

On the front lines, Lidiia found her loved one and became pregnant in 2018. She admits that they didn’t want to let her leave the battalion, but they understood that sooner or later, she would have to go. She gave birth to her daughter, Katia, who was baptized by Dmytro Kotsiubailo (Da Vinci). Despite the new chapter in her life, Lidiia was eager to return to the front.

The first time Katia visited Avdiivka, she was only ten months old. Even then, Lidiia helped the guys—she transported the wounded, provided medicine. Before the full-scale war, she visited Avdiivka with Katia a few more times, even celebrating Katia's second birthday there, alongside her godfather.

"It was very difficult to return to civilian life. When I came home pregnant, I didn’t communicate with anyone for almost a year and a half, except for my unit. No one here understood me," Lidiia recalls. "We have an association of combat veterans. I suggested making gifts for the children of the fallen, missing, and prisoners. And maybe it was this — that I could be a little bit useful — that inspired me."

When Russia launched its full-scale invasion of Ukraine, Lidiia returned to the war. By that time, her daughter was already three years old. She received a call-up and went to serve at the Kropyvnytskyi military training center.

"Since the beginning of the full-scale war, there have been many changes for me in the military. Da Vinci was a great authority for me and played a big role in my behavior within the brigades. I didn’t allow anyone to judge based on gender. For example, just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean my place is in the kitchen, and so on. I also tried to fight for the impossible for both the guys and the girls. I had a major conflict with a lieutenant colonel, where I wasn’t at fault, but he thought that because he was a lieutenant colonel, he had the right to everything. In the end, he apologized to me," says Lidiia.

During the full-scale war, Lidiia’s role evolved from a combat medic to a domestic one. She jokes that she became the "home first aid kit." She recalls an incident from the battlefield.

"In the first days, there was a [Russian troop] landing in a neighboring village. Almost no one survived, but a few soldiers managed to escape. Two weeks later, they appeared in our village, then in the neighboring one, and we couldn't catch them. After two days, we finally did. But their training, even though some claimed that some low-skill randoms were fighting us, was at a very high level. Not everyone, of course, but the trained fighters were very skilled," says Lidiia. "Everyone understood exactly where they were. And when they wanted to shoot accurately, they did; when they just wanted to scare us, they fired a few hundred meters to the side. It wasn’t because they were poor shots, but because they enjoyed it like a game."

After a while, Lidiia decided to leave the military. She found out she was pregnant for the second time, and Dmytro Kotsiubailo had also passed away. She admits to having mixed feelings, "I cried all night, but I was also pregnant."

Now, she is studying at Kharkiv University and plans to start a business with her husband.

"I am not ashamed to say that I went to a psychiatrist. She prescribed a year-long treatment course, which I am actively going through now. I feel better. I am not as aggressive as I used to be. The news affects me deeply, especially when I can't help. Where I would want to make a difference, I can't," Lidiia shares about her return to civilian life. "It's the tenth year of the war, and we still haven't created proper conditions for soldiers to reintegrate into civilian life. There's a big gap between military and civilian life. Even with children, we need to explain. I started talking to my child about the war when she was four years old after she saw my friend without an arm. She asked, 'Mom, why doesn't he have an arm?' I explained it to her. Many families shield their children from this, and the children don't understand. I know it's hard for kids, but we need to find a way to approach it."

Currently, Lidiia Zabolotska believes that more attention needs to be given to soldiers, the wounded, veterans, and the fallen in civilian life. She believes that there should be a moment of silence at 9:00 AM every day - one minute of remembrance for all the fallen, for all Ukrainians. "We must remember who we owe our independence to, who keeps the front line standing," she emphasizes.